Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer. ∼ Denis Waitley
If we have been in a relationship for an extended amount of time we have bonded with the individual. Even when things do not go well we still have a connection and there are times when we must just let go. For some, letting go can be quite easy while for others it is not easy at all. Overwhelming emotions can be a barrier when it comes to letting go. Most of us just want to live a happy life and deal with the least amount of pain as possible. We want to thrive and make a positive impact on those around us.
Pain and Letting Go.
Letting go can cause emotional pain in the beginning. Letting go of things we have grown accustomed to causes changes. Although the changes will be good in the long run, even small changes in our lives can be a bit disconcerting at first. Learning to let go of things in our past or those things that are just holding us hostage will free up energy that is being wasted.
The past injustices in our lives will only cast a shadow on our future. We have to be able to truly let go of something and move forward. This is not to say that we do not learn from past experiences because we all do. The key is to keep these things in our past and move forward uninhibited.
Our pasts can work like quicksand if we are not careful. Memories or injustices can drag us down and be devastating for our emotional health. Anything that affects our emotional health can also take its toll on our physical health if we are not careful.
Moving on to a Happier Life.
We all know that we should live a happy life. Being happy makes us more productive and is better for health. We see people be happy and take things in stride. The question we ask ourselves is why can’t we be more like that? The answer is that we can be just like that after learning to let go and move on.
Moving onto a happier life is letting go has to begin within ourselves. Both our hearts and brains have got to want the same things. This is where we need to ask ourselves about emotions involved with the event or events we can’t seem to get past. Are we still angry, sad, frightened? These are the questions we need to delve deep into ourselves to be able to answer.
It is important to remember that if these feelings are holding us back we need to come to terms with them. When the heart and brain unit, there is only one thing that is stopping us…our own unwillingness to face and accept change. Most humans will resist change, and this has been scientifically proven.
Steps for Moving On.
Moving on will work only when we are ready to accept it. Of course, there are perks if you choose not to move on. Just a few examples are:
- We can remain the victim. Remaining the victim means that we do not have to fix the problem nor address it. This gets us support, attention, and special treatment by other people.
- We assume that we are right in a situation. The other person who “did us wrong” will remain bad. For some, the other person in the wrong gives us the satisfaction of being right.
- We do not have to go into what is unknown. Nothing will have to be changed and this is just the way we like things.
There will be times in all of our lives where we delay letting go and moving on. Knowing that this reaction is normal can be comforting for some who feel as though they cannot handle change at the moment. But, not letting go can also bring about more problems that need to be addressed.
- How will not let go, be affecting us a year from now?
- What consequences could not letting go and moving on cause in our lives?
- Will other relationships be affected by our not letting go?
The answers to the above questions will help us decide if moving on is the answer we need.
Moving on Without Regrets.
The thought of moving us makes us think we may have regrets after the fact. By accepting it is time to move on we are ready to take action and not have regrets.
Learn to accept what is. Whether someone has wronged us or we had a past bad event or relationship it is time to just accept it for what it is. There will always be people in life that will wrong us. If we let the anger stay with us it will take its toll.
Moving on and letting go means that we are fighters. Removing a bad memory, or letting go of hurts will continue to help of grow. We all learn lessons from our pasts and by learning to move on we have the power over that which was controlling us.
Learning to move on with life and live happily is more rewarding than many think. By holding onto anger and hurt we are missing out on some of the best stuff in life. By accepting that things happened and life changes for a reason we are able to be more at peace. Living happily may not come easy for most people but being fighters and knowing we deserve to be happy helps us to preserver.
We would love to hear stories of those who have had to move on with life. Finding the courage can be tough but it is well worth it in the end. We do not have to settle for anything less than being truly happy within ourselves.