Of course, there is no perfect formula for creating the most successful relationships. There are some things that some couples probably do right, and they lead to a perfect relationship. So this is why there are researchers on what other couples do right, and what are the things that work.
Such studies can be of great help for us to understand what it takes to set a long lasting relationship.
So what are the results and conclusions of those studies?
1. Positivity matters a lot.
This is not that much of a surprise because the most successful relationships are led by people that are positive and ultimately happy. There are fewer conflicts in these relationships. The most strong bond in a relationship have those partners who approach and react to each other with good news. With feelings such as excitement and happiness. This behavior is crucial.
The New York Times published another research stating that couples who are aggressive and always argue and are full of sarcasm are doomed to failure. On the other hand, the ones that are caring and more positive showed no signs of breaking up.
This is just one of the reasons why we should be more optimistic and happy. So make sure you give your partner some credit when he succeeds.
2. Communication is essential.
Conflicts in communication between couples lead to unhappy couples. Of course dealing with problems is not easy but not everything has to grow in a big fight.
The most common mistake almost everyone in a relationship makes is expecting from the partner to read our mind and know what we want and what we need. This is so wrong. We need to start to communicate our wishes and needs for our partner to understand us better.
If anything came down to an argument, learn how to argue. After all, what is the purpose of arguments? It’s the solution, not the meaningless yelling around.
Achieving a good level of communication is, of course, hard but not impossible. It is not fast, and it takes time. Be persistent because a good communication is the foundation of the successful relationships. Start communicating more often and with baby steps. You will get there.
3. Maintain your friendships.
When in a relationship, of course, you have your partner as your best friend too, and you can always rely on them. However, studies have shown that is important to maintain the friendships that are outside of our relationship.
It’s like choosing not to be dependent on only one person and rely only on your partner.
Being together all the time does not necessarily mean you are a happier couple.
4. Always try new things.
Another great thing that people in successful relationships do is take new adventures together. Doing that is probably easy and exciting, but most couples are stuck in their habits and routines.
With time just keep in mind that as more fun you invest in your relationship the happier and more successful it will be – very significant and essential to your bond as a couple.
5. Sex matters.
In most successful relationships sex is important. Also, a lot of studies have shown that couples that make love more often, for example, two or three times a week are happier than the ones that don’t.
Regardless the age, the more sex you have, the more satisfaction.
Of course, we shouldn’t make deals on it or schedule the actual time but make sure we dedicate some time and spend it with our partner.
6. Stop being selfish.
To sum all the previously mentioned, to lead one of the most successful relationships, we need to stop acting so selfish. Stop being selfish when it comes to communication, positivity or even sex.
We also need to start contributing to the household chores. Such action will bring us closer and happier.
We should also make an effort to even out our drinking habits. Of course, couples that drink together tend to lead more successful relationships, but if one of the partners drinks more than the other, this is not the case.
There are many other things couples should work on or be careful with. At the end of the day, the basic formula of successful relationships is to be nice, communicate, have fun and enjoy sex with your partner more often.
Other interesting references: from Tony Robbins: THE ULTIMATE RELATIONSHIP GUIDE